You Can Go Your Own Way.

The night was electric.

Alright, alright...maybe that's a bit of a stretch.  But it did feel promising: I was going on a first date.

We had agreed to meet halfway, at a restaurant I had never heard of that was in a town I had never heard of.

Hey, a girl loves a man with a plan...even if it's off the beaten path.

From our conversations, he sounded sweet and--jackpot!--was supposedly very tall.  Always a positive for a tall drink of water like myself.  When I plugged the address into GoogleMaps, it was clear right from the start: that robotic female voice of a guide would be talking me through a fairly "scenic route". I didn't mind, though, since I kind of recognized some of the roads that were listed.  It was a pretty drive: backroads-ish, filled with open fields and big sky, which was a nice change from my everyday scenery.

I was hopeful and happy.  I had a cute outfit, a good lipstick and a plan: the drive, some dinner and maybe a smooch.  Not part of the plan, though?  I was running a little late. And it was raining.  And also getting dark outside very quickly.

Meh, minor details.  I was off!

The first bit was easy.  I was hitting a steady speed, tunes playing in the background amidst the occasional emotionless, "TURN RIGHT" and "GO STRAIGHT" droning from my phone.  I kind of knew this part.  Then, after coming around a bend, suddenly I saw them: flashing lights ahead.

Ruh-roh.

At first I couldn't tell if the lights were coming towards me or standing still.  The cars in front of me eased into a slow crawl and then a stop on the narrow country road.  And then there was quiet.  I figured it was temporary, that I'd see an ambulance make its way past us and the back-up to clear.

There wasn't.  And it didn't.

I turned off the music, squinting my eyes towards the blurry swirling red and blue, fuzzy from the raindrops rolling slowly down my windshield.  I couldn't see what was ahead, so who knew what had happened.  What I did know, based on my limited view, was there was an accident.  An accident so bad that traffic had been shut down both ways and no one was getting through.

A literal dating detour: emergency personnel were forcing us to make a hard right to the middle of nowhere.

I started to laugh a little.  I was running late and now was just going to be even later. And GoogleMaps was having a bit of a moment since Miss Robot was suddenly quiet.

Once I could stop on the side of the road, I texted my date to let him know the deal.  I re-entered the destination into my phone from my new location, hoping I could make up some time. I had a Dreamy McDreamerson to meet and I needed to get there!  It would just take a bit longer than I had expected, both figuratively and, now, literally.

GoogleMaps kicked back in and led me on a few twists and turns.  I exhaled, relieved to be on my way again.  Girlfriend was going places.  But then things started to look oddly...familiar. Off in the distance, I saw the swirling red and blue.  Yes, through different back roads, I had been led right back to where I started.  I was back at the scene of the accident.

I turned around and tried to find my way, a different way.  But GoogleMaps was again droning names of roads I was getting way too familiar with and for all the wrong reasons.  If I heard Miss Robot say "Hopewell Rocky Hill Road" one more time I swore I was going to explode.  It was trying to take me right back to the spot where I couldn't get through.

The comical symbolism was not lost on me.  Here I was, glossy and ready for a smooch.  And in front of me? A literal roadblock ahead separating me from a potential beau. Did GoogleApps have it in for me?  Or were the dating gods thwarting my travel a bit, hinting to avoid this man like the plague? Why was I being brought back to a path, again and again, that seemingly led nowhere?  Because I really felt like I wasn't getting anywhere.  I felt a bit lost.

Experience has always been my greatest teacher.  And in that experience, I was reminded: dating can be a long road at times.  Fun, yes, but also long. And rarely is it ever a straight path right to your soul mate. There are speed-ups and slowdowns, twists and turns, detours and hard stops. The journey is involved, my friends.  You may think there is a path that finally makes sense towards a person who could finally make sense. You set out on that path with an open heart and the best of intentions.  Then, out of the blue, you might find yourself right in the middle of nowhere.  Whether you're actually stuck on a road somewhere or just feeling a little stuck in general, the trick--I have found--is to have the courage to go your own way.

Sure, you won't be able to see everything that is down the road and you won't know exactly how the journey will go.  But you'll still want to go.  Because staying stuck just isn't an option and you know that there is so much to see.  No matter where you are on the road, you'll want to go.  Whether you're running late, it's raining or it seems really dark, you'll still want to go. And if it ever feels like you're spinning your wheels where you are, remember this: just because you're not "there yet" doesn't mean you're not still getting somewhere.

I took a U-turn and drove as far away from that area as I could.  Whatever I was doing wasn't working and I knew I needed to try something else.  GoogleMaps was silent for a very long time. Good, Robot Lady.  Let me figure this out for myself.   It was still raining, now very dark and felt like uncharted territory in more ways than one.  But I kept going and eventually a new way presented itself.  The Robot voice started helping me along and before I knew it, I was driving right past the other end of the closed off road.  I was taking turns and, at certain times, asking aloud to myself, Is this even a road?  At other points, I had a really hard time seeing at all where I was going.  Still at others I was dumbfounded thinking, Not only am I going to miss my date but it feels like I'm not even going to find my way out of this area, period.  But before I knew it, a couple of quick turns landed me right in front of the restaurant.

I had made it through.  And really, the journey was only just beginning.